Meetings
Standing invites, alignment calls, parking lots and the hard stop that saved one person.
Back to the Ministry
The ECA Series · Book 3 · J.D. Scruggs
Per My Last Email
64 Things We Say at Work—and What They Really Mean.
A funny office phrasebookThe phrase that sounds polite. The invoice someone else pays.
64workplace phrases
7office sections
83pages of translation
Official translation services
Every workplace has two languages.
There is what people mean, and what they can safely say. Per My Last Email translates 64 familiar office phrases, from “let’s take this offline” to “just circling back,” into their private meanings and hidden costs.
Each entry reveals what was meant, what was said, and who got the invoice. Meetings, reply-all, performance reviews, restructures, projects, culture and the remote-and-hybrid workplace are all filed here with dry humor and a straight face.
A sharp gift for coworkers, managers and anyone who has ever been looped in.
Filed by department
Inside the office
Seven familiar corners of working life, documented with the seriousness they do not deserve.
Reply-all, gentle reminders, read receipts and the six-paragraph message that was definitely fine.
Performance
Stretch goals, development areas, visibility and the rating already written before the self-assessment.
The org chart
Dotted lines, lateral moves, restructures and all the synergy one manager can survive.
Projects
Scope creep, quick wins, soft launches and lessons learned just in time to forget them.
Culture
All-hands, values, town halls, team building and the survey leadership will call a win.
Remote & hybrid
Return-to-office enthusiasm, camera expectations and the commute that somehow became collaboration.
Selected invoices
A few translations
For the record, this is what they meant.
Per My Last Email
- What I meant
- You didn’t read my last email.
- What I said
- “As per my last email...”
The invoice: The reply that follows. It will not improve things.
The FYI Forward
- What I meant
- This is your problem now.
- What I said
- “FYI — looping you in.”
The invoice: The person looped in.
The Soft Launch
- What I meant
- We are not ready.
- What I said
- “We’re doing a soft launch.”
The invoice: The users who try it first.
Appropriate recipients
Give it to someone who...
Has been cc’d too many timesAnd knows exactly why the thread is now 46 messages long.
Says “bandwidth” unironicallyBut still deserves a thoughtful, professionally deniable gift.
Has ever been looped inWithout consent, context or a realistic path back out.
Publication memo
Available now on Amazon
Choose the instant Kindle edition or the paperback for a desk, break room or professionally deniable coworker gift.
Prices shown from the Amazon listing on October 20, 2026 and may change.
Human Resources has notes
Questions
Is this a serious business book?
It is a satire with a recognizable office underneath. Every phrase has been approved by Human Resources. Human Resources did not review this book.
Do I need to read the other ECA books first?
No. This is a standalone workplace phrasebook. Readers of The Everyday Common Asshole will recognize the voice, but no prior orientation is required.
Is it a good coworker gift?
Yes, especially for anyone who has been cc’d too many times. Give it with affection and plausible deniability.
What formats are available?
The book is available on Amazon as a Kindle edition and paperback.
Satirical nonfiction. Not affiliated with or endorsed by any employer or company. © 2026 J.D. Scruggs.